Things I wish I did while dating: Amanda + Scott
This week I wanted to focus on dating. I met a really cool girl last week and we got to talking about her love life, which happens a lot with me because I’m weird and I randomly ask people I just met how their love life is going. Anyway...There’s this guy she likes and they hang out a lot, but they aren’t exclusively boyfriend and girlfriend. She told me she’s a little confused and doesn’t know how to bring up the conversation.
I remember my dating days and let me tell you, it was a ton of fun and it was no fun! You probably know what I mean am I right?! All the playing games, wondering who likes who, not knowing how to have real discussions, how to acceptably break up with someone, stressing over why they haven’t texted you back...the list goes on and on.
I
want to offer 3 dating tips while searching for your future lifelong partner.
Some people are in transition and they are just dating for fun, which is fine,
but remember: you marry who you date! These are things I wish I would have done
while dating.
1. Be selective! Yes, it feels awesome when someone is interested in you, but you don’t have to date every interested good-looking person that comes along. This is a mistake many of us make. We go with the flow, rather than create our own path. It’s like buying a car: I can’t believe I’m using this analogy right now but it works. You don’t just see a beautiful car and then immediately buy it. You test it out. You get inside and check out the interior. You drive it around the block. This obviously has more meaning than one, but what I’m trying to say is do a little testing before you commit. Once you commit, you are opening yourself up to another person, and this may not be the best person. Date people who you could potentially see yourself marrying. Basically, date guys who are husband worthy and date girls who are wife worthy.
2. Be yourself! If you can’t be yourself in the relationship, you’ll be miserable forever. I’m not saying spill all of your deepest darkest secrets on date #2, but really get to know each other, and don’t hide who you are. You should be with someone who won’t judge you when you laugh so hard you snort....or holds you when you cry after watching Christopher Robin (such a good movie). You should be able to tell them what you’re thinking and act how you want with freedom and love. Example: I dated a guy once who was really smart and I never did math around him because I suck at it and didn’t want him to think I was dumb. One time he asked me a simple math question and I was super embarrassed and freaked out. He didn’t know how to respond so I just tried avoiding the subject. Matt, who is equally if not smarter than that boyfriend helps me understand math on the daily. We took statistics together and he literally explained every lesson to me in simplified terms. Adorable right?!
3. Forgive their faults! Everyone has baggage. I’ve never met a person without any. Maybe your emotionally damaged, maybe you recently went through a bad breakup or divorce, perhaps you have deep rooted issues that go way back to childhood, maybe you’ve made a lot of bad decisions and you don’t feel optimistic about your life. Whatever your baggage is, everyone has issues and that’s ok. Find someone with baggage you can deal with and embrace, and allow that person to deal with and embrace yours. Don’t hide it from people and don’t hide behind it thinking you’re not worthy of another person’s love. A few years ago, I literally used to feel that way. I felt like I was such a bad person that God would never allow me to fall in love. I didn’t think I would find anyone who would love me for me. I’ll just tell you this. It’s a big fat lie. I may not know you that well, but I know you’re a human and most humans are trying to live a good life and contribute. Get out there and make connections. Be selective, be yourself, and if you find yourself falling for someone, forgive their faults and embrace their weaknesses. Good luck as you venture into the world of dating.
1. Be selective! Yes, it feels awesome when someone is interested in you, but you don’t have to date every interested good-looking person that comes along. This is a mistake many of us make. We go with the flow, rather than create our own path. It’s like buying a car: I can’t believe I’m using this analogy right now but it works. You don’t just see a beautiful car and then immediately buy it. You test it out. You get inside and check out the interior. You drive it around the block. This obviously has more meaning than one, but what I’m trying to say is do a little testing before you commit. Once you commit, you are opening yourself up to another person, and this may not be the best person. Date people who you could potentially see yourself marrying. Basically, date guys who are husband worthy and date girls who are wife worthy.
2. Be yourself! If you can’t be yourself in the relationship, you’ll be miserable forever. I’m not saying spill all of your deepest darkest secrets on date #2, but really get to know each other, and don’t hide who you are. You should be with someone who won’t judge you when you laugh so hard you snort....or holds you when you cry after watching Christopher Robin (such a good movie). You should be able to tell them what you’re thinking and act how you want with freedom and love. Example: I dated a guy once who was really smart and I never did math around him because I suck at it and didn’t want him to think I was dumb. One time he asked me a simple math question and I was super embarrassed and freaked out. He didn’t know how to respond so I just tried avoiding the subject. Matt, who is equally if not smarter than that boyfriend helps me understand math on the daily. We took statistics together and he literally explained every lesson to me in simplified terms. Adorable right?!
3. Forgive their faults! Everyone has baggage. I’ve never met a person without any. Maybe your emotionally damaged, maybe you recently went through a bad breakup or divorce, perhaps you have deep rooted issues that go way back to childhood, maybe you’ve made a lot of bad decisions and you don’t feel optimistic about your life. Whatever your baggage is, everyone has issues and that’s ok. Find someone with baggage you can deal with and embrace, and allow that person to deal with and embrace yours. Don’t hide it from people and don’t hide behind it thinking you’re not worthy of another person’s love. A few years ago, I literally used to feel that way. I felt like I was such a bad person that God would never allow me to fall in love. I didn’t think I would find anyone who would love me for me. I’ll just tell you this. It’s a big fat lie. I may not know you that well, but I know you’re a human and most humans are trying to live a good life and contribute. Get out there and make connections. Be selective, be yourself, and if you find yourself falling for someone, forgive their faults and embrace their weaknesses. Good luck as you venture into the world of dating.
This Shoot: Ok, this shoot was such a dream and a lot of amazing people got together to help create this magic!
Location: Ronald W Caspers Wilderness park
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