Learning to love yourself: Rain
Why is it so hard to accept ourselves? Why do we think the worst thoughts about ourselves and give others the benefit of the doubt? There’s a reason the saying “we are our own worst critic” rings true. I heard it once this way in one of my psychology classes...when you are thinking negative thoughts about yourself often, it is as if someone is following you around whispering in your ear, “you suck,” “you’re not good enough,” you’re never going to change,” your hair looks bad,” “your outfit is ugly,” and so on.
If someone was doing this to you, how would you react? I’m guessing you’d tell them to get the hell away from you! So why don’t we demand this from ourselves? We sit in depression and loneliness, and take it, over and over again. Pretty messed up right?
Somethings gotta change. Here are 4 ways to love ourselves more and instead of being our worst critic, lets be our biggest support and greatest cheerleader!
- Treat yourself like a friend: when a friend comes to you in confidence about a problem, how do you respond? If you’re a good friend, you’ll offer them honesty and help, but most importantly, LOVE. We tell them it’s ok, that they can get out of their rut, that they can come over anytime day or night, to cry on your shoulder and eat Ben & Jerrys. Try looking at yourself with this perspective. Treat yourself like a close friend that you love dearly.
- Give yourself permission to mess up: We hear this all the time...nobody’s perfect. So why do we expect perfection from ourselves? Stop trying to be perfect and start being yourself. Believe in your potential to grow and change, but remember that it’s a process. It’s not going to happen overnight. That’s ok.
3. Surround yourself with good company: If you want to start believing that you matter, you need to be around people and material that agree with you. Cut out friends that pull you down and find friends that you deserve. Read & watch stuff that uplifts you and helps you in your quest for self-love.
- Fake it till you believe it: lastly, tell yourself over and over that you are beautiful, that you are valuable to the world, that you have love to give and receive. You spend a heck of a lot of time telling yourself you suck, so put that time to better use. It may be a default for you to insult yourself. For every insult, there’s a compliment, so start there. Do it again and again until the worst critic is replaced with the biggest fan. Pretty soon, you’ll feel confident, special and important, and those that try to hurt you won’t stand a chance, because your cheerleader isn’t going anywhere.
Photo Shoot: I met Rain on Facebook when we decided to shoot together. It was so much fun and she is one hell of a model am I right!?
Location: Temecula CA
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